The Difficulty of Decisions -December 6, 2020
Updated: Jul 21, 2022
The Difficulties of Decision-Making
I am in the midst of making a hard decision, and thus, my weekly reflection is around the decision making process. Who does one trust to confide in while weighing their options? Some people believe it is best to consult others in order to make the right decisions, while others
think listening to ones intuition is the best way to go. There are obviously multiple factors that go into making a decision, and as human beings, we make hundreds of decisions on a weekly basis. Some as small as what to eat for breakfast, and others that feel more important, like who to vote for or choosing a new career.
I personally believe that every decision we make is either a decision based on love or a decision based on fear. Yes, both fear and love can be present, but there is always one that is the driving force. Beneath it all there is only one of two options, that either love or fear is dominating the direction you are choosing to take in any particular decision.
I constantly practice asking myself, "Am I making this decision from a place of fear or from a place of love?" Sometimes the hardest decisions are the ones that are being decided from a place of love. For example, leaving a career that has been your identity for your entire lifetime, in order to answer the calling of your heart that is guiding you in a different direction. This would be a love-based decision that can be extremely painful and shattering. However, the pain does not mean you are making the wrong decision, the pain is allowing you to grieve what you have known in order to make room for what is to come. This includes unraveling limiting beliefs that are causing the pain.
Why is it that intuitive decision making can feel so lonely?
The truth is, regardless of what anyone else says, you are your ultimate authority and you already have the answer inside of you. It may take time to uncover, but the answer is there. Our feelings can help guide us to what we already know. Yes, of course you must use your intellect, but the mind gets messy because of the fear. The fear will create horrific thoughts that feel too overwhelming to dodge. The fear mind wants you to stay put and change nothing because the ego believes this will help you survive. But this is simply not true, which is why we must incorporate our body, soul, and heart in our decisions. The body will help you to distinguish true thoughts vs. false thoughts. Everything is energy so beneath all options lives a different energy, or different feeling.
Here is what I do:
Find a quiet seat and ground yourself with a few breaths. Speak aloud one option, notice all of the thoughts that go with it , and begin to feel it in your body. Guide your hand to your heart or belly and feel the internal response of this option. Does it feel spacious? Restrictive? Exciting? Lacking? Scary? Then do the same thing with the other option. Whether you like the answer or not, you will feel what choice is in your highest good. The choice that energizes you and feels light, spacious, free, and peaceful is usually that choice. It may not make sense logically right away, which is where faith and trust comes in.
When it comes to my personal decisions, life has been forcibly (with love) guiding me to listen to my own inner authority and to trust my intuition fully. This is necessary for the type of work I do. To trust myself fully and wholeheartedly without any affirmation from an external source has been the hardest thing I have ever done. It has also opened me up to a new freedom and a beautiful reality that I never knew existed, and I wouldn't have it any other way.
You are divinely powerful and wise. You are the only one who knows what you truly want and need. Take action based on this with love, and you will be astounded by what opens us for you.
Have a great week,